Genius, by Design
by GoTunks
Summary: Who or what is a genius by design? How do you deal with unresiprocated atraction. Maybe no one is a genius by design. (No Usa!)


This is a one-part fic that I got the idea for when I was reading a story here on FF.net and was so disturbed; I had to do something to get it out of my mind.  
  
  
  
You may be confused by it at first but keep reading and it'll become clear.  
  
Also don't jump to who it might be at first, the title isn't always what it means.  
  
The people it ended up being at the end aren't who I planned them to be but I hope you enjoy nonetheless.  
  
I'd also like to know who you thought it would be before you got to the end.  
  
I have nothing to disclaim because I claim nothing~  
  
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Genius, by Design  
  
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It's the truth when I tell you; you're a genius by design. Or is that me?  
  
I never know what to say and if I happen to, I forget when or how. But I guess that's what I'm supposed to be. The reason I was bread and raised to be the way I am. A genius by design. I have to ask the question though, is it you or me?  
  
I remember the first time I saw you, though it was but a glimpse, my genius by design, I knew that was it. I was finished. I was enthralled and doubt I even saw you're face. Oh, no. How could I have? We were separate from each other in being and in heartbeat. On the physical side, it was two city blocks. Not to include that I was looking out a window on the fifth floor of a fascinating building. Still, I was not interested in the least. Specifically, annoyed that day by my companies ramblings.  
  
And despite the distance, my genius by design, I was able to see you amidst your own company of sorts. I could not make you out exactly, not your figure or your face. I wasn't even sure of your gender in which I assumed. But it's time my genius by design, I never even saw your face that day because I had already fallen for your eyes. Yes, your eyes.  
  
Your eyes. Your eyes. That's what had me trapped. I wanted for your eyes. And every time I close mine, I see yours. The piercing, the depth, the... the allure. I say I never saw your face, but I can't even remember the color of your entrancing orbs. What color were they again? I believe they were blue like the night sky, or perhaps it was violet or burgundy, green or crystalline. Why can I not remember but still I see them when I close my eyes. They could even be black or the brightest shade of amethyst. That what makes you, you. My genius by design.  
  
We are nothing alike but that makes us exactly alike or are we exactly alike which makes us nothing alike. I guess that's just what draws me to you my genius by design. The fact that we hold secrets like the company we hold as we live on two different sides of the spectra. Wouldn't that bring us closer in the end?  
  
Once again, I admit to myself that I fell, and though that question of your eyes still lingers in the recesses of my mind, I too, am a genius by design. And each time I close my eyes and I see yours too I also see something else. A smile. Is it your smile or my smile? Or do I not smile or was that you? Maybe we both smile or neither of us do. Don't forget, one of us is a genius by design.  
  
It's happening again, my mind is starting to think. Is that dangerous? Or was it you who was dangerous to let think? A true genius by design. Who will be the first to go?  
  
Genius by design, genius by design. What exactly had that meant? Does it mean we are intelligent or significant in our own little way? Can you answer me? Or am I fooling myself to believe that you are a genius by design.  
  
But on that day and the next, I could only think to your eyes. How could I let myself be trapped? I am a genius by design. Your eyes so haunting and grand even with out the color I fail to remember. Teal, green, amethyst, crystalline, Prussian, cobalt, violet, black, brown, red, silver, gray, amber. Those colors are all of my company and yours. Maybe no one is a genius by design. But still I had yet to meet you and your intriguing eyes.  
  
At first sighting, you had stood on that street corner, waiting to cross and that's where we locked eyes. It was a fraction of half of a second and then you were gone, having walked on and I've been searching for you ever since, my genius by design. Day by day and week by week I searched for you but I didn't know your face. I had never met you in the entirety that would be considered my life. Your eyes kept me searching and my mind never optioned for me to quit. And time passed.  
  
It was nearly a year and not once did I utter an audible word of the eyes I saw that day. And that is when we met. You walked up to me and with out stopping to look at your face, I drowned in your eyes once more. I was drawn deeper and deeper with each millionth of a moment in time but it never registered on my face. I didn't even know if you did the same. And would you believe that I again, failed to see the color of your eyes? A genius by design. With no other inclination and no introduction had been made, that's where the world shattered and everything started. I fell. I fell and fell and fell some more and wouldn't you believe the impact hurt even more. You should, I mean, you are a genius by design. Then came my company. Your company too.  
  
We both stood out from them, as we would be expected to. Genius by design. And from there I believe is when introductions were made but still I only wanted to know the color of your eyes. Your eyes. My eyes. Which one's which? A genius by design. And you didn't utter a word. Not one that I heard. And your beautiful eyes seemed to follow some one else. No matter how I tried to memorize their color, you never stopped to notice. So I followed your eyes as well and that's where I found my best friend. At the receiving end of your magnificent eyes. But I will never ask them the color of the eyes of a genius by design.  
  
That is when it hit me true like the moment before when I fell, though I still held my only question, back when my eyes had the pleasure to introduce themselves to you. It was I who stood on the street and you on the fifth floor of that floor, indulging your companies ambitions. And I met your eyes as I turned for a moment but ignored that you looked right past me. That would be a genius by design. But that is come and gone just like the times I asked myself the color of your eyes. It was still me, though, who walked away.  
  
I met you and you met me and our names remain unknown. Genius by design. We never met that way again and I still want to know the color of your wonderful eyes. But I am too distant to ask the one who entranced you the way you entranced me. But that time has long past too, wouldn't you believe, genius by design. One year after I fell for your eyes and another since your eyes fell for my friend. And do you know where I find myself dear genius by design?  
  
Standing a top a hill and looking down into a valley where I see you both. The cool wind whipping around my frame as I repeat to myself, what color are your eyes? Which of us is a genius by design? I clutch my weakness in my left hand and my strength in my right and I know that you both don't know that I'm there. And how do I know that you don't know?  
  
You walk side by side, hand in hand. You gently brush against each other as you move. A genius by design. When you pull each other into your arms and your lips meet gently, suppressing how shy and hidden you both are. And neither of you would have done that if you'd known I was here. Aren't I a genius by design?  
  
Then the laughing starts. Right at that moment. First it's quiet in the back of my mind, no longer worthy of a genius by design. And I laugh harder. With each chuckle, my laughing becomes more painful and psychotic. My sanity finally having lost its grip. I laugh like a maniac with the hot, salty tears pouring down my face and I know this letter I've addressed to you is crumpled and stained in my hand. A genius by design. And I laugh some more. The shear pleasure that I no longer have to think. No longer have to ask myself the color of your eyes or if it's mine I see at night. Every night, when I know I'll always be alone. A genius by design. That giving me even more pleasure in my frenzy, who is a genius by design?  
  
My sides are about to burst as I face the heavens, the laughter howling from inside me. Indeed, a genius by design. But then I stop when I remember. I remember the color of your eyes. I think I remembered this morning when I whipped the steam of the bathroom mirror and now I know what happens next.  
  
A single blast. The shot rings through the valley like a herd of wild horses upon my firing the gun. And finally you heard. You both did. And you both come running. But you've got a ways to go as my body falls back and strikes the ground. A genius by design. My eyes, the color like yours, are slightly open as the tears still pour out and my mouth open in a smile as I had never stopped laughing at the irony when the trigger was pulled. Genius by design. The blood surrounding me slowly by what I myself had created, or maybe the blame is on you. And knowing you both and not knowing you at all. I know this is when you will reach me. Seconds to late. Genius by design.  
  
You both kneel down, not sure what to say. Or do you need help on how to say it? I'll say it. I have no problem with it what so ever. I'll say it quietly so as not to scare my friend but also remember that my sanity isn't what it used to be. But truthfully, I think I'm dead. And here's where you find my letter addressed to you, genius by design. But I'm afraid you arrived too soon. You didn't leave enough time for my blood to soak into the neatly written stationary sheets.  
  
Genius by design.  
  
Here then, is where I'm sure you're reading what I wrote. Genius by design.  
  
It took this long but whisper it if you will. I only wanted to know the color of your eyes. I never even got your name. But I found my own answer, looking in the mirror. Genius by design. I tried so hard and it took so long and on the second anniversary of when I met your eyes. An answer was giver to me where I didn't think to look and at the same time I was given an answer I didn't want to know.  
  
Blue. Blue. Isn't that a joke? I'm slipping once more. My eyes were blue from the start and you know what else? Neither of us are a genius by design. No. No. Not at all. We are far from that beauty. Hah. Genius by design. But I guess it's only fair, I tell you my name and to take care of my best friend. Though we were never that close, I'm sure my name has been cried by now.  
  
My name? My name? A genius by design. I'll say this last my dear Prussian Blues; take care of her and her violet eyes. The true genius by design. Watashi Mizuno Ami, I was never who you thought she'd be. I'm no longer a genius by design.  
  
  
  
Fin~  
  
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So what did you think?  
  
Keep in mind though that I would never do this to a character I didn't like. I wouldn't waste the effort.  
  
Heero is my fav pilot and Rei and Ami are the two I like to see him with.  
  
I apologize if I offended anyone, but I do understand suicide and I was knocking anything.  
  
Suicide isn't the only way out.  
  
Tchus  
  
'Tunks 


End file.
